Turning toward the light

Posted On January 19, 2026

In some ways it’s completely fitting that 2025 is non-existent on this blog. 

There are many reasons I didn’t write last year. And it’s not that I simply didn’t write here; I didn’t write. There are doubtlessly a few half finished snippets in a notebook here or there, but nothing I would revisit and certainly nothing I would share with the world. 

I’m not going to go into the myriad of reasons for my silence. Suffice it to say that it was a year of self and community care, of contemplation and of deconstruction. I’m just breaking the surface of that deep dive and catching my breath, but it seemed time to put words down again and gently venture into the light once more. 

That’s where my focus has been lately. Light. In the darkest times, it’s what we all need to reach for in big and small ways. 

The eggnog is long gone, most of the tinsel is down, but the Christmas tree still stands and is still lit every morning. It’s a fake one. Relax. 

It’s actually a Christmas tree fort. When changes of health and space dictated that we give up our tradition of dragging 24 ft of balsam into our house, I couldn’t bring myself to just order a generic fake tree. So we custom built a tree that allows us to fill the base with pillows and curl up INSIDE a magical world of light and color. Some of the best naps of my life have been taken in that tree. It makes it all the harder to take it down each year. 
So it stands, long into January, still lit every day despite our crippling electric bill. While it will likely come down by the end of the month, a few designated strands of light will be left up year round to brighten dark moments. I’ve also been enjoying my morning coffee next to the happy light. In the evenings, we’ve been trying to incorporate more candle and lamp light in an attempt to sooth our frazzled nervous systems with gentle fire. 

It’s dark out there. The nights are still long. The dawn still feels slow to come. It would be so easy to just curl up in a ball and do nothing. And yet.

So we turn our eyes to the light wherever we can find it. And we make light ourselves when we cannot. For us that looks like gathering with friends, checking on our neighbors, disappearing into nature, and adding sparks of actual light to the dark mornings and evenings. Simple tasks that allow us to put one foot in front of the other during the dark days.  

For me, now, I think it also looks like coming back to writing after such a long hiatus that I wasn’t sure this was something I did anymore. If I do it with openness, honesty and integrity, they certainly won’t all be winners, but I hope that on some days, my words can also provide a spark of light for you.